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The Post-Valentine's Day Thang (dadang dadong dong)

Valentine's Day has gone and this panda for one is THANKFUL that piece of crappy day is ovah. I mean, bad enough that you're all lonely, with no mate, no TV show to hang you over, and no popcorn in the oven, but to have a stupid calendar actually poke you in the face and go "ha-ha, you pathetic LOSER!" with a picture of two cupid chunky heads just looking at you with biddy eyes and flappy wings... well, that's just WRONG, in the most devious ways.
What's so special about Valentine's Day anyway? So you get candy. So what? You can get candy anytime of the year. You get a bear hugging a heart. So? I saw a bear hugging a heart once, that wasn't a pretty picture to see, the heart being all bloody and shit I'll tell you that... You get a ring, or jewlerry. Honey, if that man of yours is getting you jewlery and/or taking you out to dinner/movies, he WANTS SOME, and if you're not putting on, he'll go two ways: he'll politely smile and say it's okay while thinking "oh that BIATCH!" OR he will tell you "hey baby, it's fine..." and then go out and have some skanky pole dancer give him the Shakira dance on his lap. Either way, you have to put. Now, if you don't put because of the red tide came, then you'll just have to put AFTER.

Love DOES stink sometimes. And I don't mean like "Oh, love sucks, I don't EVER want to be in love", it just that even though I am well aware that V day is just another campaign add for all those companies that sell candy and cards. But then again, when you don't get these things, it kind of makes you think that no one loves you or that you're so insignificant that no one even bothers to send you a silly "hello there!" on your iphone or email. That's why I am proposing the Anti-Valentine's Day DAY. It's a day when you don't give a rat's ass about people. Wanna get laid? Just ask for it. Want to tell off your boss or co-workers? Hey, today is the day! Wanna tell your girl/boy what you really think of their stupid cat? Go for it! You'll have one day and one day only to say all those things you've been wanting to say but don't get the chance to. Cards and candy commemorating the ocassion will be selling at Walmart like pancakes. And if you don't have a partner/friends. No problem! You can just tell people on the street without getting the "are you mental?" look from strangers.

All this comes from a very disturbed mind, mind you. I know that there are a lot of hopeless romantics out there (shame on you!) who still believe that V day is a day of love and friendship. Let me get it clear in your head, people: you do not need a calendar to remind yourself to tell that someone that you care about them! You have to tell those people that you love them and care for them EVERY DAY, with your actions, words, and the eventual tiny present like gum, or a pretty sea shell. The point here is that if you're waiting for V day to express yourself, dude, you have more problems than me.







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